Can a Sister Complain for a Minute?

Yuck.  Some days are just, yuck.

Today is not one of those days.  And yesterday wasn’t either.  But late last night and early this morning sureashell were.

For a good fifteen hours, nursing school took over my rationality and let my emotions stampede like the animals in Jumanji.  Poor Dave.  The man will go straight to Heaven for living his life with me.

I suppose it started late last night after dinner.  Dave had to finish a test online and then we were going to hang, watch some Downton, drink some tea, and chat.  Turns out his test took longer than he had anticipated, and by the time he was done, we were both exhausted and could barely keep our eyes open.

That tiny straw briefly debilitated this camel’s back.

Silly, right?  I know.  I know we have it so easy.  I know there are other people who are doing the same school thing with harder circumstances or who are living it with children (and they deserve a two week vacation jam-packed with oceans and margaritas).  I know we are so beyond blessed with our jobs and with Dave’s particular career choice.  I know this is what Dave wants and what I want for him.  I know I’m so lucky that Dave never complains, always finds plenty of time to devote to me, and always manages everything on his plate with a grateful smile.  I know we have the best life and that the Lord has more than provided for everything we need right now.  I know this time of schooling is short and that it will be over before we know it.  I know we will look back on this time and smile (actually, yeah right).  I know it is what is best for our family in the long run.  I know this is helping me to be more selfless and supportive.  I know I only get irritated because I’m selfish and impatient and weak and whiny (clearly).  I know that this is exactly where we are meant to be for now.  I know there are plenty of lessons for me to learn from this experience… yada yada yada, blah blah blah.

I know.

But some days are just more difficult than the others.  Some days warrant a quick rant.

Some days are harder to juggle, to balance, and to complete well than others.

Some days I prefer comfort over greatness (sorry, Papa B).

Some days I want to say, “Screw it!  Let’s just go ahead and move to South America for mission and live off the grid and off the land”.

And some days all I can see ahead of us are more years of school and perpetual stacks of nursing books on our kitchen table.

Nursing Books

Yuck.

Alright, I’m done.  I promise to do penance for wasting precious minutes of your life.

I also promise to suck it up and get over myself.  If you need me, I’ll be doing just that while folding laundry (can that be the penance?).

In the meantime, watch something uplifting and undo this crab-fest.

Comments

  1. Oh my gosh…I love you! I laughed out loud when I read this post! Some days, this is exactly how I feel. But it’s days like this for me that make the good ones feel even better! 🙂

  2. I actually love this post! I can’t tell you how many times I log in and just want to strip away all my pride and write about how tough and yucky life can be, even if it is for the silliest reasons (and I KNOW they are silly but I don’t care!). Thank you for your courage to admit that sometimes life is just the pits, and that, even if we acknowledge that, it doesn’t necessarily make everything better.

    Life does go on and there are happier days ahead, I’m sure, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t take a minute to say, “Hey, this sucks.” Now, go watch some Downton and relax…while folding laundry? 😉

  3. Babygirl:( you’re not whiny or anything close. You are beautiful and your heart is SO massive. Blowing my mind. You and Dave are such a testament to fighting the good fight. ALWAYS praying for both of you.

Leave a Reply